Blogging hasn't always been a form of escape, as I did go through a time when I over-thought blogging too. I worried about why my instagram wasn't as pretty as other peoples, if my tweets were funny or relatable enough, why I don't get as many comments as I used to and I worried about trying to keep a consistent amount of traffic and how to do that whole SEO thing...
Well I've come to the conclusion that over-thinking the whole blogging thing as well as overthinking just about everything else in my life is exhausting. It just made me want to give it up, but I realised I didn't have to give up blogging. just the over-thinking it part. So that's what I've done. I've reverted back to the start where I simply write posts, share it a couple of times, reply to my comments and, when I remember, go and visit the blogs of the bloggers who visit me.
I've stopped myself from worrying about follower counts and I barely even bat an eyelid to how much traffic is coming in on this blog anymore. I value each comment by the individual who wrote it rather than putting a value on the number of comments I receive in total. I don't feel guilty if I only post once a week and I skip past the twitter chats and posts about how to make your blog better which hold the non-existent magic formula to instant blogging fame.
It doesn't bother me if I'm "relevant" in the fashion or blogging world, and my 5 times when having a smaller blog is better post has thoroughly convinced me that I don't want internet fame. I'm actually content (and not only content but happy) with where my blog is right now. I adore the down-to-earth and like-minded people who communicate with me via this blog and I've realised I don't need anything more from blogging than that! The only target I have for blogging now is that rather than over-thinking my own blog, use that energy to get to know you guys better and go visit more of your blogs.
Sorting out this part of my life has actually been quite freeing really. Just coming to terms with what I want from this blog means I don't have to think about it very much, leaving space for me to sort out all the other things I overthink about... It doesn't mean that I don't want to do well in the blogging world, I've just let go of any thoughts of how I should be blogging, and rather just let blogging come naturally and free like how it was for me at the start.